Thirst ..

I was thirsty.
I welcomed the rain on its way
Welcomed every drop, with its vivid wilderness
Got drenched by its each drop;
Embraced it with my open arms -
It moved gently through my eyes, my lips
Through each undulations of my body
Feeling it deep down , I remained thirsty.
One single drop in my tongue made me feel
A drop of "hemlock, I had drunk"
I wanted to break free my barriers
But next moment , I shrieked.
To tough to tough to hold me-
From escaping all barriers
To tough to tough to calm me -
To suppress the feelings truly rare.
Drops dripping down every hair strand,
Were drops of pearl as shown;
Glitters of droplets in my palm,
Were that of precious stones.
Still it could not quench thirst's thirst
Thirst that I felt something other
The warmth I felt through out the body
With each and every touch.
I was thirsty -
I remained thirsty
But feelings, the same.. not much.

They ...

Seeking Paradise is fancying
Dwindling between Paradise Lost and Regained
Wanted Something but could not say
The words lost track in its way
Hell found incomparable to Hell.
Have to survive, though unwanted
Men, Women, Children and Invalids
Came ... stayed and passed away.
" Here I stay, this is my home,
Can never move out, though want to."
No figures, I find wanting me away...
Helpless I stand-- fixed my way.
Begging; Food, Help, Security, Love
Me the outside visitor staring blue..
Helpless as them can do nothing.
But time and space moves out to be
The one which forms Eternity
I wanted to stop - Stop to look,
But couldn't bear the frightful sight
The beauty of mind and soul they bear
Though suffering surrounding all along them.
Have painful eyes but smiling lips
No complains they have - maybe unaware
The heaven I felt, The paradise I found
On seeing hell, the place they live...

Silent Rape

Broken bangles, droopy flowers
Abandoned hair clips, undone bed
Drape spread all over the bed
She got married.
It was her first night.
She heard it from all, the beauty of it.
She knew how she will be loved and pampered
She waited long for this night.
She was a fair beauty, a virgin and had dreams
She dreamt of that perfect groom her whole life.
She day dreamed , how he would turn out to be
She never indulged in any affairs to have a taste of it.
Now, there she stands -
Red faced, clumsy hair, hardly dressed
Still able to taste his tobacco stench lips
The newly wedded bride,
She was silently raped -
It was her "first night".

Leisure ...Loneliness ...Wait

Leisure, Loneliness, Wait
Three words that defines me now,
Three words that I find myself juggling with
Three dammed words that I know by heart, by now-
When one becomes the other I do not know,
Like I do not know how days turns to weeks,turns to months and then years.

I like it, ... do I?

I question myself many a times,
I keep on asking and in vain with no answer to console me with

I wonder, ...do I?

I wonder, how a bird flies so high without the fear of falling
I wonder, how fishes swim so deep in, without the fear of being burdened.

I fear, ...do I?

I fear the secrets to get exposed
I fear the complications to get untangled
I fear the day I loose these three words

Suddenly,
I am confused, ..am I?

Confused about everything that is shaping up,
Confused about the "man" I am liking
Confused about the small happiness still in my life
And then I ask again to me -

I like it, ...do I?
I say ... Yes "I DO".

Rain but Lonely

The World seems grey to me,
Never knew when it turned to grey..
Wondered and still wondering,
Why ME, Why ME, why ME.
Who with colours of the world sees grey
Suddenly realised not my heart that turned grey
Its the world that I live in
The heat faded the colours of it
The recent rain washed the rest that was still alive
I laughed...
I remember, earlier I loved writing about rain,
Glorifying it.
Now.. I shout.. I scream .. I find loneliness..

Memoirs of a Whore..

Once someone brought me here
Never I saw him again,
I see faces of strangers all day long
I find him in them, but sorry I am,
I try..

The room with no window,
No known faces around
The pillows are all wet, so is the damped bed,
I console myself and
I cry..

Someday I will buy my freedom,
Someday I will move back to retaliate
Someday I will have dreams not nightmares, so
I lie..

The sparkling dresses I wear
The jewellery that glitters on me
All call me DEAR DARLING PRECIOUS
But make haste to see me naked
I feel shy..

No one to hear me shout
No one to give me shoulders but cold
All pay for the time span
No one willing to spoil that, but with me-
They buy..

I live, I despair
I see no MAN but faceless creatures
They come they go
They let me rot and die
I die.. but to myself
I lie..